Discover Your Adult Child
Discover Your Adult Child is a remarkable memoir depicting one man's courage, discipline, and resilience as he overcomes childhood trauma related to his father's alcoholism.
Merging personal experience with meticulous research, author Tom O'Connor also shares practical knowledge and survival skills to help other adult children of alcoholics lead happier lives. His story offers validation, empathy, and hope for a peaceful and stable future.
Through a series of heartfelt and, at times, humorous narratives, O’Connor explores what it’s like to be the child of an alcoholic.
In the United States, there are over 20 million adult children of alcoholics. As a member of this group, author Tom O’Connor spent years grappling with the instability he endured being raised by an alcoholic father and an enabling mother. Reflecting on his experiences, O’Connor relates his story of resilience, compassion and forgiveness.
Book Reviews
"Most trauma doesn’t scream. It whispers in adulthood. But we’re often too busy surviving to stop and listen. How to reconnect with your childhood story in 1 book. I you grew up with an alcoholic parent, you may still be carrying the weight. The people-pleasing.The fear of conflict.The pressure to be perfect.The deep sadness you can’t explain.It’s not just your past. It’s your nervous system. It’s the way you see the world.Tom O’Connor gets this because he lived it.
In his book Discover Your Adult Child, he shares a lifetime of insight through both personal experience and a professional lens.But this isn't just another memoir. It’s a mirror and a guide.
It teaches you to:
✅Understand the roots of your behaviors
✅Unlearn survival patterns that no longer serve you
✅Reclaim the freedom your childhood didn’t give you
The stories are raw. The tools are practical. The message is powerful:You’re not broken.You were trained to survive.I’m recommending this book because I believe more people need this one.Especially those in mental health, trauma healing, or coaching. Healing isn’t just a personal act; it’s generational. I’m grateful to Tom O’Connor for writing what many feel but can’t find the words to say."
~Mohammed Ali Shahzad Pakistan April 17, 2025
"Like Tom O'Connor, I was raised by an alcoholic father. I immediately identified with Tom's story. As he tells his journey of growing up in an alcoholic family, he breaks down the destructive impact of the alcoholic parent on the family. Discover Your Adult Child helped me better understand each family member's role in this dysfunctional family soup."
~Doug F. MA 2024
About The Author
Tom O’Connor is a retired businessman with a B.A. in psychology. As a child of an alcoholic, he is passionate about helping individuals with adult-child syndrome, substance use disorder, and co-occurring disorders to heal and live peaceful lives. He lives in Florida with his wife and two Golden Retrievers.
As the firstborn son, Tom O’Connor spent his life running away from generations of alcoholic men. Raised by an alcoholic father and an enabling mother, he spent years grappling with the volatility he endured. It was only in retirement, while researching children of alcoholics, that he discovered he was suffering from Adult-Child Syndrome (ACS)
Helpful Resources
Suicide Prevention Resources
Suicide Prevention Resource Center
Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA)
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC)
https://www.cdc.gov/suicide/resources/prevention.html
National Institute of Mental Health (NIH)
Helpful Adult Child Syndrome Resources
National Association for Children of Addiction
NACOA provides solutions for the children of parents struggling with alcohol or substance abuse.
Adult Children of Alcoholics/Dysfunctional Families
Provides a Twelve Step/Tradition program for people who grew up in a dysfunctional home
Helpful Substance Use Disorder Resources
Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters
Provides local support groups for those people who are worried about someone with a drinking problem.
Recovery
What can I expect in rehab?
Recovered
Provides support and resources to help you understand and cope with addiction to alcohol and drugs.
Helpful Co-occurring Disorders Resources
Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA)
National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI)